Screwed Up Essay T-Shirt

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in the morning I phoned the locksmith and told him that I couldn't manage it and wasn't there somebody he could send up? "the doorknob's frozen so I'll have to fix the doorknob first." he sat down on the steps and twisted at the door knob and I walked to a table in the other room and sat where I could see him.

there was a newspaper there I had already read and I began to read it again.

the only view was the back of a Chevron gas station. I asked him if he might tell me a little bit about reinstalling locks. it doesn't matter which part you stick in here, either end will do." I asked him if either end would do then why did one end have a nodule on it while the other end was flat?

I looked at it for quite a while then I walked over to my car and looked at it for a while and then I lit a cigarette and walked back. "that's a good question," he said, "now this part, these two prongs slip in here, you hold it together against the front of the lock and tighten the 3 screws.

there was some trouble pushing the screws in against the wood and getting them started but then it was done but it wasn't right: the latch was locked against the handle and it wouldn't lift up.

I phoned my girlfriend and told her that I just couldn't install door locks.5 or ten minutes went by and I said, "look, let's just replace every thing..knob, new lock and I'll pay for everything." "wait," he said, "give me a chance." I read the newspaper some more, I read through the whole front section. then that's the trouble: let me see the other lock." I showed him the other lock.then the repairman stood up: "I'll be back, I'm going to have to lubricate this thing..." he was gone for about twenty minutes and when he came back the doorknob was no longer frozen and he fit the lock parts back in and bolted them home. "it works but there's still something wrong here that I don't understand." "it's strange," I said, "I had very little trouble putting the lock in the side door." "you mean," he asked, "that there are two locks? "it's falling out," I said, "but it works." he told me, "you mixed the parts of the two locks. " "no, all I have are twenties." "you'll need a receipt?also, when you do this make sure the lock is in the locked position." I drove the locks back to my place and I tried the side door first and everything seemed to fit all right, it locked and unlocked, although there was space around the lock and the door itself and it wouldn't slide in flush.then I tried the front door I put the handle back on then I slipped the parts together.I uncorked some wine and sat down at the typewriter and turned on the radio and smoked cigars and typed.I drank the wine and smoked and typed until somewhere between one and two a.m.See our Privacy Policy and Third Party Partners to learn more about the use of data and your rights. Aeon email newsletters are issued by the not-for-profit, registered charity Aeon Media Group Ltd (Australian Business Number 80 612 076 614)."it's easy," she said, "I've changed dozens myself, there's nothing to it." I told her that it wasn't easy because even when they told you some things they left other things out."just forget the locks," she said, "I'll fix them when I get there." the problem was that she wasn't coming until the next day.

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